Funeral, Memorial services, Remembering...
After our baby dies, instead of parenting a live child, we must face decisions that we never dreamed would be ours to make. Our new reality comes quickly and sears our hearts. Most of us have never experienced a close death or if we have others have been the ones to make the major decisions. (For example when a grandparent or older relative or friend has died.) Now, we are not only dealing with shock and grief, but we have to create a world for our tiny baby. We must "parent" our babies so our memories will be as gentle as we can make them. SA hopes this page will help with these decisions.
If cremation is chosen, many of the decisions about the funeral and memorial service can wait until weeks, months or even years later. If a burial is decided upon for the immediate future, we suggest that planning begin as both parents can be a part of it.
Parenting your baby is important...
While in the hospital, parenting our babies includes dressing, holding, wrapping them in blankets, and may involve other traditions and farewells. Then, as we gently plan how we will care for our baby's body, we look at past and present traditions and our available options.
Even if you are reading this page and little was done at the time of your baby's death, you can create a beautiful service and make precious moments - over the a period of time. Doing so will help you find comfort in the love you feel for your child. I have seen many parents begin to heal as they brought their love forward and recognized their baby with a healing service and/or keepsakes. It is never too late to remember, to parent and to heal (some more).
Advocacy and Awareness have brought a change in care and healing...
An interesting note, this page has been here for many years, but it is just recently that parents have finally, as a result of years of advocacy, been encouraged to embrace their child. Thankfully, parents are being encouraged to embrace their babies no manner what the gestation of their baby is. One of my long time board members reminded me yesterday, that when their full term baby was born still, they were encouraged to forget and move on. This was in the early 90s at a big, local hospital! We are moving along the path. I believe that sites and groups such as SA that have supported recognition and care for our babies have helped to make the difference. Marcia McGinnis 10.2007
SA mom, Sara's Story and Memorial Service for Lily 2011 - Healing after a miscarriage... Includes beautiful pictures
"Parenting and loving our baby. Gentle ways to say Goodbye.."
"Thoughs for planning a service or a less formal gathering..no matter when the loss happened"
"Years later -even if we already had a memorial or for a baby that no one "held in their arms"
Gently "Saying Goodbye" - Real stories from real parents through the years.
Special Services or Memories sent in by parents
Memorial Poems written by a parent, a friend, or a relative.
Sites with urns & certificates of life; TCF books for funeral support, etc.
List of Supportive Atlanta Area Funeral Homes
Finding support with SA Online:
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