Reasons for this Month: Hope and Healing
Permission to Grieve and Options by Marcia McGinnis (2003)
Every bereaved parent should be given permission to grieve and given possible options for healing. If and when they choose to grieve, and what they choose to do is their decision.
Being given some possible options lets them know that they are not alone in their grief, pain, and confusion. Parents who have experienced similar losses are there for them when they need support. We appreciate that not everyone will ask for support. For many, the realization that they are not alone gives them comfort.
Death at birth is not understood by society.
Reactions are usually driven by misunderstanding, denial, and fear of the unknown. Society questions is it “right” to grieve a person that no one knew even though the parent usually feels as though s/he did know this little one. Parents often fear what others will think or that recognition of their loss will make them hurt more.
These activities lessen the misconceptions so parents may own their true feelings and reactions. Hopefully, they can feel safe to ask for the support they need to move through the grieving process.
Death before and at birth does cause grief.
Death of a baby during pregnancy or of a newborn occurs more often than society realizes. The good news is that many of these deaths are no longer mysteries because of the connections made from groups such as SHARE Atlanta, the March of Dimes (MOD), research and medical professionals. There is advocacy, now, for intervention and prevention of the difficult pregnancy.
A “voice” as we support one another
Parents who have experienced pregnancy or newborn loss have a voice with groups such as SHARE Atlanta and MODs. Our issues, both emotional and physical, are important and by facing them, more babies will live, and less parents will suffer alone after the death of their unborn or newly born child. Hope, not pain and confusion, will be the lasting memory as healing occurs. by Marcia McGinnis
Much of the above was taken from...Aug./Sept. '91,Loving Arms Newsletter, Pregnancy and Infant Loss Center, Inc., 1421 E. Wayzata Blvd., #30 Wayzata, MN 55391 or call 612-473-9372.
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