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Our SA-SIDS' Grief Support Forum Moderator's Story and why she wishes to support others. ~ Belinda

Kyam

This is my son Kyam and my name is Belinda A. McClendon and I lost my son to SIDS.

On March 12, 1991 at 2:31 pm a beautiful baby boy was born looking just like his mother. My son was born at 34 weeks. He was 5lbs 11ozs and 13 inches long. Even though he was a preemie, he was actually big enough to go home with me. I named him Kyam because it means strong-willed, ambitious, and independent which are all the makings of a leader and from day one he was the smilingest baby I have even seen, sleeping or awake he was smiling.

His first trip to the doctor’s office he weighed in at 9 lbs and was cooing at everyone that came close enough to him.

On June 5, I laid him down for his afternoon nap smiling in his sleep as normal but that was the last one I saw. It was time for a feeding so I went to wake him and my smiling baby wasn’t breathing. I tried to wake him until the paramedics got there and they tried to revive him on their way to the hospital but it was too late.

I buried my son on June 12, 1991 in Babyland Cemetery in Philadelphia, PA. My life was changed forever.

I decided that losing my son was not going to be in vain so I have been helping other parents through their grief over losing a baby to SIDS because I have been through that emotional rollercoaster. Helping them through the grief process understanding that nobody really knows what happened but reinforcing that they are good people good parents.

I loved my son with all my heart and this is the least I can do to honor him. There is healing in sharing. Sharing stops the feeling of isolation like you are the only one. A different prospective allows you to experience different feelings.